/ by Caleb Blansett

 
 
"and it was stated, in no uncertain terms, in the type of silence that has no flavor, that such things were inarguably no longer suitable. For which purposes were not made clear but rather gained definition through their inclusiveness, a muddying of the water. To which end they became dirty and hideous, megalomaniac monsters shuffling through clean suburban neighborhoods speaking in lilted, educated accents. Trimming the bushes and watering the dogs. Be certain to write in an apostrophe for the apostates of this rancid, civilized violence. Dogs do not enjoy being trimmed, anymore than the bushes enjoy being watered. Mother made it quite clear on that point, with a vocality that seemed to be asking for a map. The house an echo chamber for thoughts too proud to overtly query their way through murky waters. The house a site of disco warfare1, but we don't have the balls to actually hurt. So the Carpenters2 have been playing on repeat, while bridges are being built: a new charitable organization to provide homes for all of these neighborhood trolls3, watered by the sweat of our toils."

"and it was thus decided, by a jury of archetypal dissidents, to abstain from further scrutiny of such abject abasement. Improvisation had dehydrated even the keenest eye4, and they were all now dry for having waded through. and it was unanimously decided to watch the evidence again, for the sake of empathy. and it was gregariously - gregariously? - admitted that it was not a valedictorian effort to validate their time spent wading - waiting? - these nodding heads. Discussed - disgust? - with themselves (and their) virtues in favor and against pursuit. Pursuit of what5?"

1. See Disco Terrorism
2. See Superstar
3. Consider previous refernce of "shuffling monster"
4. See "How to Dance in Deserts" by J.K. Symptom, and "Effects of Dehydration on the Brain; Hangovers, Breakups, and Hot Yoga" by Multiple Authors
5. These are trivial questions and shall no longer be warranted divergence of resources for the purpose of scrutiny.